The Leaders and the People

Macron comes to God and says: “Tell me, God, how many years before my people will be happy?”

‘Fifty years.’ replies God.

Macron weeps and leaves

Trudeau comes to God and says: “Tell me, God, how many years before my people will be happy?”

‘A hundred years.’ replies God.

Trudeau weeps and leaves.

Trump comes to God and says, “Tell me, God, how many years before my people will be happy?”

God weeps and leaves.
****†**********

In Washington DC a man is running along the street shouting :”The whole world is suffering because of one man! One man!

He is seizes by the Secret Service and taken for interrogation.

“What were you shouting in the streets?” asks the interrogator.

“I was shouting that the whole world suffers because of one man.”

‘ And who did you have in mind?’ The interrigators eyes narrow.

‘What do you mean, who?’ The man is astonished. ‘Bernie Madoff, natrually.’

‘Ah-h-h……’ smiles the interrogator. ‘Incidents’ that case you are free to leave.

The man walks the length of the room, reaches the door, opens it and suddenly stops and turns around to face the interrogator.

‘Excuse me but who did you have in mind?’

**†************†******
….. Yesterday in Washington DC an attempt was made on President Trump’s life by an unidentified assailant. The bullet penetrated the bullet-proof car window, hit President Trump on the forehead, ricocheted and killed the driver.

*******†*********†********
Trudeau is visiting Washington DC. The White House organized a foot race between Trump and Trudeau. Trudeau was first to the finishing line, and Trump second, well behind. 

The next morning, Sean Spicer gives a Press Briefing: “Yesterday a foot race took place at the White House, President Trump gained second place, Mr. Trudeau came in second to last.’
†*********†**********†******
President Trump, President Macron  and Prime Minister Trudeau assemble for a conference. After days of conferring they decide to take a break- they would go to India to hunt elephants.

The very first day, towards nightfall, they caught an elephant. They decided to tie it to a tree and agreed to take turns guarding it, then in the morning they would decide what to do with it.

The first guard was President Macron. He stood guard for two hours, woke Prime Minister Trudeau, then went to sleep. Macron stood guard for two hours, woke Trump, then went to sleep. Trump went to sleep too.

In the morning they all woke up and there was no elephant.

‘When is the elephant?’ They ask Trump.

‘What elephant?’

‘What do you mean, “What elephant”?’ The others are indignant. ‘Did we come to India to hunt elephants?’

‘What did’

‘Did we catch an elephant?’

‘What did’

‘Did we tie it to a tree?’

‘We did’

‘Did we agree to take turns guarding it?’

‘We did’

‘Did Macron stand guard?’

‘He did’

‘Did he he hand the elephant over to Trudeau?’

‘He did’

‘Did Trudeau stand guard?’

‘He did’

‘Did he hand the elephant over to you?’

‘He did’

‘What elephant?’
******†*******†************
A man ran through the streets of Washington DC shouting ‘Trump is an imbecile!’

He was seized by the Secret Service and given two charges, one for defamation, the other for leaking state secrets.

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About limey6

Father of four, husband of one, Ex-pat ex cop Englishman living in rural Maine
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